Pirate bay to be blocked in the UK.

Our Poor Friends in Sweden

In what I am sure will be the first of such acts, our friends in Sweden, aka Pirate Bay, will be blocked by five ISPs in the UK. I know this isn't technically movie news but I felt moved to write something. I am still reeling from the horror of this communist act by Dave Cameron and his cronies.

Although, just to throw the cat amongst the pigeons, we don't feel any animosity towards the British Government intervening with the take down of child abuse websites (interfering would have been the wrong word), do we? Child abuse is rightfully outlawed and websites promoting the act are outlawed too. So why shouldn't a website like Pirate Bay be illegal also? It actively allows it's users to obtain illegal material which directly infringe copyright. 

Ahoy Bill, you CISPA supporting mother trucker.

I would never pay for a film like, say, Conan the Barbarian, that would be absurd. Yet I would download it, which is the point of this blog. In society today there is a line between what we would pay for and what we would, if we don't get caught of course, obtain illegally. I don't care what you say; downloading a film/CD/etc is not the same as sticking up a bank or pinching a Milkybar from the co-op. I don't care if some fatcat at Universal doesn't get his bonus this year, or some coked up rockstar doesn't sell as many EPs. I speak in hyperbole but so do politicians, my point is that even with piracy the industry will still make a profit. Most people, like myself, download shit that we wouldn't pay for, and would gladly pay to go and see a film that is worth it. 

Anyway, rant over, what do you make of it all? This Guardian article is quite interesting. Feel free to comment (UNLESS THEY BAN FREE SPEECH...).

Lockout

I'm getting beat up by a guy named Rupert?

Luc Besson wrote it so you’re in right? RIGHT? It’ll be like Fifth Element but with more cheese and bigger guns! Well Guy Pearce’s arms at least.
Reading about the film I was sold by Besson alone. But then I heard it was to be an unashamedly 80s throwback and I giggled like a schoolgirl. The question of course is did it deliver? It was meant to be a film without any pretenses; a cool sci-fi with some awesome action sequences and sharp one-liners. Unfortunately it lacked any real explosive power and I was left wanting more.

Scene

Set in the near-future (obviously) Lockout follows a falsely convicted ex-government agent who is given the chance of freedom. All he has to do is break into a maximum security prison where the prisoners have escaped and rescue the president’s daughter. Oh, and the prison is in space.

Take

If you’re looking for an intelligent, tense and powerful sci-fi wait for Prometheus, because Lockout ain’t it. You really need to find out a bit about the film before you go and see it, hence why I’ve stuck the first five minutes below. I went in with low expectations, with the main attraction being a dry script with plenty of humorous quips. And, to be fair, it didn’t disappoint on that front.

The disappointment lay in the lack of tension, the poor CGI and the predictability of the screenplay. The 'futuristic' motorbike chase in the beginning of the film is a joke, like someone made it on their home PC and the production team copied and pasted it from youtube. The script genuinely saves the day. That and Guy Pearce's delivery of it. It is proof that post-Die Hard one-liners can still be credible, if only as deadpan sarcasm.


Whilst Guy Pearce's performance was sterling, for it was Joseph Gilgun's role that stole the show (see above). You'll know him This is England (all of them), he played Woody, but you wouldn't recognise him in Lockout. He plays a crazy-ass Scottish lunatic who is always fucking up, with hilarious consequences. I really hope to see him in more stuff.

Director

The Directors, James Mather and Stephen St. Leger, who also co-wrote, can hardly claim to be masters of the craft but there weren't any glaring errors. Of course the CGI was shit, there was a lack of urgency in moving the narrative along and there was a lack of inventiveness in the editing for a sci-fi, but let's not focus on the negatives you know? The few fight scenes were reasonably sleek and there was palpable chemistry between Guy Pearce and Maggie Grace so let's leave it at that.

And... Cut.

Well they say Love is blind, and it couldn't be truer than my perception of Lockout. It was slammed by the critics and arguably they're right. But I love Luc Besson, the script was cool and the film was buoyed by some strong performances. I didn't mention Maggie Grace (Taken) who was smoking as ever. 
[Whilst writing this I have just discovered that Luc Besson is working on Taken 2 and now I’ve become distracted.]
So whilst it was disappointing in places, and it's certainly not Besson's finest work, it's definitely worth watching. But it's not worth wasting £8 at the cinema, that'll just make the bad CGI bigger.

Rampart

You are the most Beautiful Woman I’ve ever seen... In this bar.

Woody Harrelson- Everyone’s favourite vegan. Mine anyway. And Rampart is classic Woody territory; indie, quirky, brutal and achingly cool, it is truly an excellent film.

Scene

Woody Harrelson plays David Brown, an LAPD cop and classic (some would say cliché) anti-hero. He’s a drunk, a womaniser and he doesn’t play by the rules, but man does he get it done. He lives with his girlfriend and his ex (they’re sisters, don’t ask) and two kids (thankfully from the same woman), yet he still finds the time to sleep around. The film basically follows Rampart as he becomes embroiled in a PR battle against the LAPD after being caught on tape beating a guy up who had just crashed into his patrol car. 

Take

Firstly, right off the bat, I want to make it clear that to describe Rampart as a cliché cop film couldn’t be further from the truth. Rampart is an intelligent film, masterfully shot and with a razor-sharp script.

Harrelson’s performance is up there with Natural Born Killers, portraying the classic dichotomy of character, brutal and slightly twisted yet undoubtedly misunderstood and with a tenderness that has all but rotted to the core. David Brown is a man seemingly without conscience, love for his family is all he clings onto as the world around him (albeit via the microcosm of LA) falls to ruin. The storyline charts part of this decline and Woody plays the broken hero magnificently.

Of course we have seen this washed up drunk who is deep-down-adorable countless times before but Rampart seems to avoid being tiresome. Brown smokes more than the cast of Mad Men combined and drinks like a fish but he doesn’t turn to drink to solve his problems, and he is much more upbeat than, say, Bruce Willis’ character Hartigan from Sin City.

I’m surprised Bruce Willis wasn’t in Rampart to be honest, the supporting cast was excellent. Steve Buscemi, Sigourney Weaver, Ben Foster, Robert Wisdom (from the Wire!) and even that ginger chick from Sex and the City that made the warty one look attractive.

Director

Oren Moverman is relatively unheard of but he should be given a decent budget after Rampart, which he co-wrote as well.

In terms of direction the film excels. In parts shot like a ‘cop documentary’, in parts art house, it is anything but ordinary. Pompous as it sounds I particularly like the use of the colour red throughout the film, portraying lust, love and anger. Watch it, you’ll notice it. And I must mention an excellent scene in which Brown and one of his conquests are having a discussion whilst watching Flamenco, with the dialogue becoming heated as the dance reaches its climax: brilliant metaphor.

And... Cut.

It’s difficult to write a review for Rampart without sounding like a film student who has seen too many Stanley Kubrick films but it has that affect on you. It’s powerful, enthralling and enwraps you from the beginning.

Unfortunately my local cinema only shows Disney films and Rhianna covered in seamen so I didn’t get to see Rampart at the cinema. If you can go and watch it, do it, if you can’t then buy it. If you’re poor download it because you need to watch it. Unless you just want Walt Disney and seamen, in which case I can’t help you.

War, Inc

Tamerlane used the exact same RPG firing pin rod assembly technology that it uses in the prosthetic knees of its dancing legs.

It has tanks, it has wit, it has anorexics who demand fried chicken, what more do you want?

Scene

If have I got News for you did an entire film taking the piss out of the war in Iraq and various other aspects of American ideology; it would be like War, Inc. Although I don’t think Paul Merton would be as good as John Cusack (no offence Paul). The film is set in fictional “Turaqistan” where war has become privatised and everyone wants a piece of the pie. Brand Hauser (Cusack) is an assassin posing as a Trade Show Producer who has to take out an oil tycoon, organise a high-profile wedding and keep a sexy left-wing reporter in check. Sounds crazy right? It is. Bat-shit surreal.

Take

I swore I’d never forgive John Cusack after “2012” but technically this was made before so we’re ok. Oh and I might still see that Edgar-Allen-Poe-as-a-detective film, The Raven, just because I’m a sucker for punishment.

I don’t know how Cusack ever got the budget for the film but I am glad he did. Co-writing, producing and acting might have helped fund the thing I guess. And some money for advertising Popeye’s chicken maybe. As I said the film is surreal, and certainly attempts to make some poignant remarks about the commercialisation of war and Western Culture in general. On the whole I think it achieved it’s aim but you can’t help but feel that some of the satire was lacking in ferocity. It wasn’t quite as blunt as say, Four Lions.

However an excellent cast certainly help matters. John Cusack is formidable as the soulless satire of an assassin (poetry) but for me the star of the show was Joan Cusack (sister not wife) who was laugh out loud mental. Brittany Murphy is in it too, she is borderline anorexic, or attractive as some people would call it. And then you’ve got Ben Kingsley as the Vice Roy and Dan Ackroyd as a ‘vice-president’ (unmistakably Dick Cheney), brilliant!

Director

Not much to say about the director, Joshua Seftel, he is relatively unknown. He did some Queer Eye for the Straight Guy? Who gives a shit.

And... Cut.

It was good to see John Cusack only acting that he had lost his soul, not actually doing it like he did in 2012. War, inc is the kind of film Cusack belongs in. It’s up there with the highlights of his career, High Fidelity and Being John Malkovich. Cusack isn’t a superstar, he’s a poor man’s Kevin Spacey and I like him better for it. War, Inc is an indie film, which is what Cusack should stick with.

Some of the critics were harsh but fuck ‘em, this is worth seeing. And you’ll probably get in the bargain bin at Blockbuster for £1.50.

Hugo

If you've ever wondered where your dreams come from, you look around... this is where they're made.

Hugo is truly original cinema. A film harking back to the glory days of cinema, truly capturing the magic of film making now usurped by CGI and illegal downloads. I watched a pirated version, naturally, but it was a good rip.

Scene

Put simply the film is magical. A simple story of an orphan living in amongst the walls and clocks of a train station, fascinated by mechanics and film, whose only memory of his father is an ‘automaton’ which they started to build together and he is trying to complete. Hugo is played brilliantly by Asa Butterfield who stars alongside Sacha Baron Cohen, Sir Ben Kingsley and the rising fame of actress Chloë Grace Moretz. Just don't look at the poor boys flaring nostrils, it'll drive you mad.

Take

I’m still not sure whether it’s a good kid’s film. I enjoyed it, film buffs would enjoy it and the Academy certainly enjoyed it (it won 5 Oscars), but can children really enjoy a film without monsters, aliens or a cat with a Spanish accent? My girlfriend, who loves kid’s films, got bored and I couldn’t help but wonder if kids would be genuinely excited by the storyline.

A screenshot from the first ever sci-fi 'A Trip to the Moon', which is featured in the film.

Maybe Scorcese’s kids made him do it so at least they could learn more about cinema without listening to their Dad bore them over the Sunday Roast. This is one thing the film does achieve; it gives you a very interesting insight into the history of cinema. Kingsley’s character, Georges Méliès, is a genuine director, and the film features actual footage from the early 20^th century. A novel idea but I’m not sure if kids would be interested when it’s cloudy with a chance of meatballs. Well, unless they’re Scorcese’s kids.

Director

What can I say? It’s Scorcese. The man is a movie marvel. He is to Spielberg what Pegg is to Cruise; a bigger geek and a more refined talent. But then to compare Scorcese to Spielberg would mean comparing Hugo to E.T and that’s a a battle Hugo can't win. The only kids film that beats E.T is The Goonies, and I won’t hear any argument against it.

But back to Hugo; it is directed superbly, rich in colour with sleek , inventive editing, it’s what anyone would expect from the man who knows movies. The plot unravels nicely as the film progresses, balancing neatly between adult and child expectations. The film maintains an innocence that is often lacking these days but has more than enough charm and intelligence to keep the grown-ups interested.

And... Cut.

I thought truly original children’s films like this died with the birth of CGI and the rise of Pixar but Scorcese has reinvigorated live-action for kids. And even the brats can’t sit still you can definitely enjoy this one on your own.

A point I think I must make is that Hugo was shot in 3D and I feel that I lost part of the magic of the film by watching it in 2D standard definition. I can certainly see that the depth that Scorcese applied to many of the scenes would have been improved by seeing it at the cinema. As Empire aptly described it (before giving it an inevitable 4 stars)- it’s the most beautiful fan-fiction yet written.

The film was designed for cinema, by a true connoisseur. But, obviously, seeing it at the cinema is somewhat difficult now so I would recommend purchasing the Blu-ray. Or watch it on your 3D TV if you got lucky in the London riots.

If you're that way inclined some geeky stuff about the film can be found here.